O H M Y H E A R T

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life

hello, december!

motherhoodcourtneeComment

My last post was almost a month ago and I feel like life and everything I thought about the world has completely changed! First, came the shock, followed by anger and then grief. There are those that will claim those of us on "the losing side" are cry babies and need to get over it. I don't know if I ever will. This time a spark has been lit and there is no place for apathy or complacency. And so, as I continue to work and harness my anguish into something productive, life continues. 

And here we are! December. The end of the year and the beginning of the holiday season. There are several things I'm looking forward to this month- some holiday get-togethers, experiencing all of sights and sounds of the season through the lens of a two-year-old and lots of family time. There are also a few goals I have this month- documenting our favorite things and blogging more consistently-are the two that I'm really going to focus on as the year ends. 

motherhood{things i learned from my toddler}

motherhoodcourtneeComment

having a toddler in the house is sometimes like living with yoda. they're tiny, odd and teach you lessons you never knew you needed to learn. the force is strong with these tiny humans! here are some of the life lessons i've picked up from master rowan.

1. enjoy the process- we're big fans of self directed play around here. i love sit and watch him. he'll dump out a bin of blocks and put them all back in. sometimes he'll leave them out and build with them. sometimes he'll have them interact with other things. sometimes he's very content to dump them out and put them back over and over and over. is he learning a lesson? trying to figure out the most efficient way to do it? or how high he can stack before the lid refuses to snap shut? perhaps. or maybe there is something soothing to the rhythm of repetition. i'm not sure what it is but he talks and giggles to himself as if he's enjoying whatever it is. 

2. one meltdown won't stop the show- i'm not really great in dealing with disruptions to my schedule. it will throw my entire day off kilter leaving me feeling out of sorts for the rest of the day. i find it difficult to pull myself out of the resulting funk which colors my interactions with people that day. if you've spent anytime with a toddler you already know that meltdowns and tiny frustrations are bound to happen. the great thing about them is once they're over, they're over. disappointments and frustrations disappear almost as quickly as they happen. trust me when i say that nothing will stop them from moving on. recognizing this in rowan as well as living on his schedule has loosened up the stickler in me. as the kids say #youmadornah    

3. confidence- i'm convinced toddlers are the most confident beings on the planet! climbing onto the table...mom, i got this. reaching the snacks on the table...mom, i got this. interacting with new kids on the playground...mom, i got this. dressing themselves in the most interesting way...mom, i can rock this. there is no task he won't attempt to do on his own. no food he's hesitant to try. no person he won't attempt to befriend. confidence is something we're born with. fear/self doubt/self consciousness are all learned.  

   when i started this motherhood gig i was so young and felt so inadequate and unprepared. i was so worried about getting it all right. it's not that i didn't think they had anything to teach me it's just that i was too afraid of losing control. it wasn't possible for me to absorb the lessons. i love that having rowan has changed me so much in such a short amount of time.